I never knew that love is art. It's funny; one day your mind is a blank canvas & before you know it one name is painted over & over again & no matter how hard you try, you can't paint over it. It's like using an eraser on marker. The harder you press, the further it smears & smudges. The mere outline of their name is now a purple blob surrounding every corner of your mind & there's no way to escape it. Every thought ranges from amethyst to lavender & you're still trying to quit. Trying to erase the violet hands pulling you in & making you feel what you've never felt before.
Now purple is your favorite color; you don't try to fight it anymore. Though every single bone inside of you screamed no, the warmth of their body pressing against yours screamed something else. You crave the taste of their lips & the sound of their laugh at 4 am. There's no sweeter satisfaction than hearing your name roll off their tongue. You never thought much of brown eyes & now they hold the stars in them & freckles never looked so good until they swept across their cheekbones forming a perfect little galaxy. They're a work of art. A masterpiece.
But everything can't be perfect. Without them you are nothing. You're like a child afraid of the dark because they are your beam of light & without them every nightmare comes to life. You drive yourself crazy thinking of every reason why they wouldn't want to love you anymore. While they themselves are perfect & pure in every single way; you are polluted & damaged & full of self hatred. It distorts you & destroys your mind.
Now you see more than purple because every mark has blended into something unrecognizable.
Now "I love you" makes you cringe & the sight of magenta gives you migraines. You couldn't love them simply because you didn't love yourself. You're a mess. You're scribbles of crayons on a coloring book with no trace of a pattern or reason. But time passes & wounds heal & you start coloring inside of the lines again. Love isn't so scary & it teaches you so much. However, love is tricky. One wrong stroke & you've mixed blue & yellow & you have designed something you never intended to. That's the art of falling in love. You can't see exactly what you're going to end up creating, but no matter what: it's always beautiful & it's always a masterpiece.
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